I Lose Sleep Over Poor Scores

A little more than 3 months in blogging and I'm losing sleep over small things. I know it's just a score but I can't help myself. I'm nerdy that way.  I didn't even know I'm failing and had the lowest score ever! (I may be exaggerating, or maybe not). I tried to find out how I can get my scores up but I'm reaching dead ends. Nothing seem to work. I cannot find what I need to see. The more I learn, the more I don't know.

I'm talking about my PageSpeed Insights Score. I'll give a disclaimer right now: these are all information mostly from Google and I don't really know what I'm talking about. Google is my friend! I'm just rambling and you can stop reading now if you want to. 

Oh, you are still interested? I'm warning you again, this may not make sense at all. Clear?

Here's a little backstory. I want to DIY all the nitty gritty stuff on my blog because I like the challenge and I love learning new stuff. I also don't have the budget to pay for professionals. I decided I am not seriously monetizing my blog (yet) so I will just park on investing serious money into it too.

Now I want to get real skills and get my self out of this hole I dig myself. It started with checking what Alexa Scores are because a lot of blogger groups mention Alexa. I learned about Google Analytics soon enough. Then I got curious about my Page Rank. I just kept on reading more self-help guides on Blogger and blogging in general to get the website to do good metrics wise. I am trying to learn things here and there, tweak one thing then another. Fix broken things and break unbroken codes. Then start googling again and take another "improve the website" project. I'm nerdy that way. 

When my Google Page Rank does not seem to get anywhere, I stumbled upon PageSpeed Insights. PageSpeed Insights will help you identify performance best practices that can be applied to your site. Apparently, Google will not rank your page or rank it low for different reasons. One of them is slow loading of the website. This I understand a lot. I don't want to visit websites that take ages to load. I will just leave pronto! Well, I am my top reader and I want my blog page optimized. 

I run the test and what's my score? 12/100! OMG! This broke my heart! I rarely fail on school exams. I will retake a test if needed as long as I got the high marks. I lose sleep over poor scores. I somehow had let go of this obsession college days, because it's impossible to perfect anything in college! I don't know why I'm feeling this way again. I want at least a passing score (that's 80/100 according to Google). But my googling skills are failing me right now because the instructions suggested in the analysis is way beyond my comprehension. I felt like I did what I can and more but nothing is working. And that's why it's painful. OA much? Hey, I warned you! You can tell me now I can let it go. These are old stuff and people really don't care. I shouldn't anyway. It's just all numbers. But just the sight of that red highlight on my score? It's like an itch I can't scratch.

For now, I'm telling myself I have to focus on what I'm writing instead. I'm doing this for Mila right? She would not care about how popular my blog is or how fast it loads the next page. I still need alot of work on my grammar and my technique. So I am letting this go. For now. But I am not giving up. I'm nerdy that way. Give me a test, I want to ace it. And I will. I just need time. And focus. And divine intervention. And...